


The ups and downs of karkles and friends

by AnimeJunky



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Caliginous Romance | Kismesis, Death, Drama, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Smut, High School, Human/Troll Society, M/M, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance, Romance, breaking of the fourth wall, i'll most likely will put a shit load of sex scenes later
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-14
Updated: 2014-12-23
Packaged: 2018-02-25 08:45:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2615558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnimeJunky/pseuds/AnimeJunky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Karkat Vantas. Since your all of your family has either died, was killed, or just up and left, you have been an orphan who was adopted by the infamous "problem sleuth" Spades Slick, and his lovely wife Ms.Paint. You soon begin to attend Huss High witch is hell on earth. You met a couple of your online "friends" there so it isn't that bad. Totally side tracking the bullying and all the death traps set up around the school. Then you meet a sexy tall ass white haired Texas douche named Dave fucking Strider. Will this be the best romance you've ever heard about? FUCK NO, but all though things start of kind of off between- what am I saying you and Stridick start out horribly. Yet you still get together and for once in your life you feel truly...happy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The somewhat sad beginning

Its cold. Like really fucking cold. You almost mistake the freezing water as hot water, but the realization hits you hard that you are in fact drowning. You don’t panic you just sit there, eyes closed in a deep state of confusion. How did this happen? Where am I? Slowly opening your eyes you see your older brother, Kankri, Just laying there with a piece of the car door lodged in his chest. You disliked your older brother a lot but he never deserved this. You even regret ever saying a silly threat like “I swear to fucking gog if you don’t SHUT THE FUCK UP I promise you asshat that I will rip your fucking throat out!”  
You start to hear noises you can’t really make them out but they sounded like sirens. Your oxygen was decreasing fast. You turn your head forward and see your dad he is-...was a politician he was nicknamed the Sufferer. You have little of a clue why, nor did you care. Harsh, but hey isn't it said that honesty is the best policy. OH and ain't it about that time to pass out and die. You suddenly feel the crashed vehicle move. Things started to blur. It was pissing you off but once again you give up all hope of caring. The car was soon pulled out of the water and put on a deck. Right before that moment of life fading to darkness, you hear what you make out to be “THERE'S A BOY THAT'S STILL ALIVE!!!” then some saw noises and you feel pretty damn warm all the sudden. You kinda wanted to see how things played out from here but FINALLY that whole life fading to darkness thing oh yeah it decided to pay you a visit and BAM sleep sleep time for Karkat. At that moment your life changed for the worst...but maybe this is a change for the better....

* * *

 

That was all 8 years ago. Wait ha your probably as confused as lil fuckass was, you are, well okay then allow me to give you all the info you seek. OKAY so as you know young reader, Karkat's daddy was a politician and as you may or may not know that when your a politician and you don't agree with others, fights happen. Sometimes just small little arguments. Yet in other cases people end up getting killed. WELP you guessed it! That's what happened to the poor Sufferer...and his oldest son. So yeah the Vantas family was rushed to the hospital where the Sufferer and Kankri were pronounced dead. Luckily Karkat survived he just had some cuts, a broken arm, some glass stuck in his neck, and a piece of plastic stabbing the crap out of his right leg. With the help of surgery and some physical therapy his leg and neck make it. And they slowly but surely heal after about three months. At that time Karkat was needed to be released but there was no family members of his that could take care of him. His real mother, the Dolorosa, was killed by a high ranked sea dweller. His step mother, the Disciple, had dispersed but she was most likely killed by a high blood or an indigo blood. While Kankri and Sufferer were assassinated. Karkat was on the list too but they failed to finish the job. In the end he ended up moving from foster home to foster home all over the US. By the age of 13 he was adopted by a couple in Washington, Spades Slick and his wife Ms.Paint, they enrolled him into Huss High. It was Ms.Paint's idea she thought it would be nice to see her new son at the high school she worked at. It just so happened that some online "friends" of his attended too, but that was the only real up side to this deal the down side was the fact he was bullied mostly because of one his eyes, he has smoky grey pupils while other trolls have black pupils with a hint of whatever color their blood color they had. Two, his horns. Three, his height. And four, his blood color as much as he tried to hide it an asshole decided to fuck around with a knife and the dickwad cut him you can imagine what happened next. -_- you're to lazy to even guess, damn reader. Anyways he gets his ass handed to him and comes home all bloody. Slick has a little father/son chat and cut himself then Karkat to show kitkat that they're equals. Yada Yada blah blah blah and boom you're pretty much all caught up.


	2. Karkat ===> show the new boy around the hell hole

BEEP. BEEEP. BEEEEEP!

Your eyes snap open, and with one swift movement you destroy your alarm clock. Hmm what is this the um lets see...12th time you've done this. I mean really Karkat must you destroy everything that pisses you off. You let out a small growl from the pain in your wrist. Then you finally decide to get the fuck up. You check out your surroundings, the birds are chirping, the sun is shining, the smell of an enraged Karkat fills the air. YEP the BEST way to start your day. Now its time to cut the crap and take care of yourself. Heading towards the bathroom you hear your "mother and father" happily singing I'm A Member Of The Midnight Crew. You find yourself unknowingly humming the tune. It doesn't really bother you, you've pretty much taken a liking to the song. Other than that you listen to more Rock, indie punk, and American rock bands like My Chem romance, Nirvana, KISS, Mindless Self Indulgence, BVB and other stuff like that. FUCK if you keep thinking about music you're gonna be late for school. If it was like any other school you had been put in you really wouldn't have cared BUT if you're late for Huss High you have to spend the whole day with Hussy himself and you **DO NOT** want to go through that...again. SO you hurry up and put on your signature black cancer shirt, some ripped up grey skinnys, and your piercings , brush your teeth, wrap up your recently injured wrist, slip on some ratty old black chucks, grab your bag, and head off to school with on your bike. You reach the school 20 minutes early so you got some free time. You contemplate what you should do with this free time. Should you call your mom and tell her you're at school. Nah, she'll probably tell you in the sweetest way to come back home and eat some breakfast. After about two minutes you choose to chill in the library. Once you enter the cold library you see John Egbert. You and John have hated each other for years.

* * *

 

Karkat ===> have a flashback

You met him when you first entered the school at the age of 13, he was one of your first online "friends". You and him started to hang more, red feelings were held for the nerd but he was "not a homo" and totally flipped off your feelings. That didn't stop you from being hate friends with him, you even kinda got over him after a year and started to date a troll named Terezi. At this point you had a solid relationship with TZ and a solid hate friendship with John. You even thought you completely got over him but one day you two were hanging out in the library reading and all the sudden he kissed you.  
"mmph!" you quickly push him away "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOUR FUCKING DOING YOU FOUR EYED PIECE OF SHIT!" a small laugh escaped the nerds lips "Simple I was kissing you" you growl " YOU KNOW THATS NOT WHAT I MEANT YOU ASSHAT...why....why did you fucking kiss me?" the four eyed nerd silently sat there for a second. "I kissed you because I like you and I know you like me too." Your heart almost stopped after he said that.

* * *

What was going on in Karkat's head

Wait did he really just said that. And to me of all people. I....I think I'm going to puke. How...how could he say this so nonchalantly. "I don't fucking like you, how dare you fucking say that to me after you trampled over my fucking feelings last year, huh?" A-am I crying "Was this apart of some elaborate fucking plan. HA it probably was. Yeah it all makes sense, have Karkat fall head over heels in love with you, reject him when he confesses his dumbass feelings, then a year later when he has buried his red feelings and got over you, hell even got a fucking girlfriend, you go along and kiss him not because you fucking love him or anything." Karkat stop "You just want to toy with him" please stop talking "And when your game is over." no shut up "You throw him away." please just shut the fuck up "And leave him there to be hurt and confused." SHUT UP!

* * *

regular POV

 

At this point you look like a mess, candy red tears stain your face, choking on your tears from time to time. John just stands there mouth opened slightly. He walks up to you and tries to hug you. That's when you snap and punch his face and he stumbles back. You give him a blow to the gut and walk out of the library. You're so glad that you choose to come to school an hour before it starts because the librarian, and mostly all the other teachers, were in the teacher's lounges and the halls were completely empty so was the library putting aside the fact john was still in there. You pull out your phone to check the time. It was 7:45, your first class starts at 8:00 so you walk to the 9th grade Algebra classroom.

* * *

Karkat ===> end your dumbass flashback

 

You growl at even thinking back to that day. Your snap out of you little anger trance by someone tapping your shoulder. You turn to see who the fuck it is. OH GREATTTTT... its your ex-girlfriend. Terezi Pyrope. TZ dumped you when you were 15, witch was last year, you found out she was cheating on you with Vriska Serket (AKA spidey bitch). Then she dumped you, end of story. "What the fuck do you want." you say in a very dull manner. "Awwwww, can't I just come and see my old buddy" she says in a fake bubbly tone "No, no you fucking can not. Now stop wasting my time and tell me why you're here." She rolled her eyes and stuck out her tongue "Fine, I'll tell you. Doc sent me and Lemonsnout here," she holds out a lemon colored scalemate with skyblue buttons for eyes and a noose around its neck "to tell you that your on new kid duty." You let out a sigh and rub the bridge of your nose "How many human and/or trolls do I have to fucking babysit today"

"Only one today Karkles." "THANK GOG!" She gave you another eye roll then a toothy shit eating grin "ANDDDDD guess what???" you look up at her and slight glare "What?!?" "The "kid" you're "babysitting" is my boyfriend and by the way his name is Dave Strider."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I've decided that if I'm gonna write this story I'd want people to like it. NOW I wanna make things clear, I AM NOT forcing you to leave kudos but I'm just sayin, Hey if you like the story so far and you wanna read more of it leave some kudos it'll mean a lot to me.  
> OH and if your confused with the age thing goin on then this is for you, if not well um yeah.  
> SOOOO in the first chapter Kitkat is 8 years old and as you know he was adopted when he was 13  
> and in this chapter he's 16 going on 17 and in the 11th grade  
> in the beginning of the flashback when he meets John he is 13 and when the library thing goes down he's 14  
> at the age of 15 he gets cheated on by TZ and gets dumped by he also.  
> hoped this helped you reader ^_^


	3. Karkat ===> show the new boy around the hell hole part2

* * *

"regular POV"

  WELP isn't this just fucking great. You have to babysit TZ's boyfriend. JUST FUCKING GREAT. See Karkat, this...oh yes is in fact KARMA. It's a bitch ain't it. How does it feel, huh Karkat? Sucks balls right. Well that's just what happens when you're a totally asshole 24/7, yup. Ya know that alarm clock you broke, you know the one I'm talking about the one that goes BEEP BEEP BEEP. Yeahhhhh that one, great you remember. This situation is that alarm clock saying "Fuck you Karkat, I only wanted to help you...*sob sob* I- I...I didn't want to tell you this but...I loved you...and *SOB* I-...I was pregnant- OKAY LOOKY HERE I DIDN'T FUCK AN ALARM CLOCK SO STFU, OKAY? OKAY. NOW LOOK I FUCKING GET IT. I DESERVE THIS. BUT WERE IN THIS SHIT, TOGETHER. FOR THE LONGGGG HALLLLL. YOU SEE NARRATOR. YOUR GONNA HAVE TO TELL THE FUCKING STORY. SO THAT MEANS, TEEN DRAMA. KARMA'S A BITCH. AIN'T SHE? 

* * *

._. real regular POV

  Now that the bullshitery is over..."Karkles?" Terezi waves her hand in front of your face. "Karkat!" She paps you, welcome back to reality Karkles "What the fuck TZ" she gets in one more eye roll "You were spaced out, anyways you should head to the reception office. He should be here by now." You pull out your phone 7:55 "Okay, see ya Terezi" She grins "Hope you have fun Karkles." You playfully flip her off and walk to the reception office to pick up Dave. When you get there you are greeted by your "mom". "Hi my sweet little Karkitten!" She squeals while you narrow your eyes. Then you hear Eridan yell out "Momma's boy", you give him your signature flip off and your "mom" hits your shoulder lightly. "Bad Karkitten, no romcoms tonight" You let out a small growl "Look can I just get what I came for and go?" she sighs "Yes yes, of course. Now here is your new schedule." She then handed you two slips of paper, one for you and one for Dave. The schedule read:

8:00 - 8:40     History  
8:45 - 9:45     Math  
9:50 - 10:50   Language Arts  
10:50 -12:25  Lunch/Free time  
12:30 - 1:30   Music (you were guessing Dave picked this)/ Art on Wednesdays   
1:35 - 2:35     Science/ Health on Wednesdays  

Not that bad, you thought. "Okay so wheres the brat?" She pointed over to the tall smokin hawt albino that was leaning against the wall. That song HOT like WOW played in your head while you gawked at him "That there is Dave Strider. He was sent- I mean..he moved here from Texas a couple weeks ago." You couldn't stop looking at him. No wonder why one of the most popular girls (Terezi) in school was dating him. He's like a fucking sex god. He could get any girl he wanted with just a fucking wink. When you finished day dreaming you realized that he was smirking at you. A light blush grew on your face and you hoped that he didn't notice. Luckily his shades prevented  him from seeing your cute blush. "Now seeing that your in such a rush to leave, you two may go." And with that you and sexy shades went to the shaded area of the court yard to "chill". 

It was pretty fucking silent and it was bothering you. 

* * *

Karkat ===> decide to say something 

as you opened your mouth to say something Dave interrupted "So Karkitten, what do we have planned for today?" "One call me Karkitten again and I will beat the shit out of you. Two I'm just gonna show you around the fucking school, get lunch then leave." He laughed a bit "Lolnope. I already know this school inside and out sooo since we don't have to show up at any of the classes, me and you are gonna go some where" "But how shithead, it's not like we own cars" He grins " Dont worry your pretty little head bro, I have a motorcycle." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well sorry i haven't posted any new chapters guys the holidays are filled with fuck loads of shenanigans...and yaoi....and boyfriends.....and shopping for dumb bullshit .-. BUT im gonna try to update more


	4. Karkat ===> Go somewhere with Dave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was inspired by this bullshit right here www.youtube.com/watch?v=tNWFpCPZ4VI   
> this chapter is rated RAS (retarded ass shit) if you can not handle RAS then please, leave now while you can...but then a again you did read homestuck which is pretty much RAS on steroids so...yeah ._.

* * *

  So to sum up what happened, you agreed. Yeah that's right something in your head just said fuck it lets follow the dumbass teen. He drove you to a music shop. 

* * *

Karkat's POV

GREAT as if my day couldn't get any worse. Now I have to listen to dumbass music. He probably LOVES Green Day. GOG DAMN I HATE GREEN DAY! THEY SUCK! I mean not all of their songs are bad but most of them are. 

Karkat ===> Watch Dave totally avode the Green Day section

THANK GOG! Wait why do I even give a shit about his music preferences?  OH YEAHHHH you have to spend a whole month with this hot douche. Might as well get to know him a bit.

Karkat ===> Follow Dave

* * *

regular POV

  You find Dave in rap section of the store. Hm not that bad. You walk over to the Troll Will Smith CDs and a cocky chuckle spews from Dave's mouth.

"Fuck you and your dumbass opinions you piece of shit."

"I didn't even say anything though."

"Didn't say anything my fuckin ass, you thought it its the same damn thing. Whats so fucking bad about Troll Will Smith even?"

"Whats so bad is his raps, they're so weak dude." You aggressively pap him in the most hateful way "Hey it's just the truth. I'd pick Snoop Lion or Slim Shady over Troll Will Smith any day." You couldn't really argue with the Slim Shady part the douche bag did have a fuckin point but Snoop Lion really I mean come the fuck on dude he cant rap for shit and wasn't his name Snoop Dog. Wait...WHO THE FUCK CARES! Okay so moving on.

"Can we fucking go soon?!" 

"Sure thing princesses." You let out a sigh of relief "Once I get my dupstep on." That sigh of relief turns into a groan wait dubstep...oh. hell. fucking. YES! "Like as in Skrillex?"

"Yup" You smiled like a fuckin dumbass. "Well I have all of his albums, a couple of Deadmau5 tracks, and some TNGHT tracks if you want them." He grinned "Cool, you could come over to my place this Friday to drop them off and hang out." "Sure sounds great"

* * *

Narrator ===> timeskip to day of the fucking day

Well looky looky you got a date...wait no....hang out session? idfk. It cant be a date of course for two reasons 1 he's dating TZ 2 he's so out of your league. Anyways your have had it for today all you wanna do is watch some romcoms. Lets remember that your mom said no romcoms tonight and you already know your "dad" has most likely found all the romcoms in your room and gave them to your "mom" while you were gone. BOOM there goes you plans for tonight GREATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT oh... You walk over to your dresser and push it to the side, lift up the floor bored and grab a yaoi to watch. Hehehehehe your night isn't totally ruined 

Karkat ===> spend the rest of your night watching yaoi 

 

 

 


End file.
